Friday, January 23, 2009

Weekend ahead

I'm looking forward to a weekend with not a damn thing planned. That, my friends, is something delightful. Maybe I'll clean the house, maybe work in the yard. Maybe it'll continue to rain which will force me to do absolutely nothing constructive but sit in the living room on the big comfy couch. Maybe I'll turn up the music and open the windows to the rain and sing my little heart out.

I think I may do one totally spontaneous thing this weekend. These kinds of things always end up being a great adventure, and totally out of my comfort zone. I think I may take a few hour's drive and find a new favorite place. What I'd really like is to be transported to a magically beautiful place that takes no time or energy or planning. But just short of that, I'll be fine with a drive. I'm really not that picky.

I wonder if I'll ever find that person, that one person who completely understands me? Or at least someone who is willing to join this search with me and hold my hand along the way? It doesn't have to be a spouse even, just a friend. Just someone to listen and validate and care. Isn't that what we all want? But how can we (me)...how can I find anything of substance to ground me if I'm scared to death of everything that would ground me. I don't think I can win. I just want a fighting chance.

2 comments:

Davlin said...

I honestly think you're taking a step in the right direction. You've already made a tremendous amount of progress since the first blog. You sound a lot more positive lately, I'm proud of you for that.

Want to make you mine... said...

Truth be told, I've been wanting to take a midnight drive out to Cocoa Beach and lose myself in the sand until I start becoming a Popsicle.

Your little spontaneous weekend sounds like a tremendously great idea. I hope to find a new favorite place in the near future and someone to share it with, whether it be that someone special or with my best friend(s).

Good Luck! Do let us know how that turns out : )